The Hectic Week

penatnya minggu nih..company tgh nak launch system baru.so this week kene buat mcm2 benda sebelum 1 nov.kene training,kene review user guide,training makan masa seharian,review pun seharian,ngan rutin seharian lagi..aduhhh..tak terkejar rasanye..punyalah penat..rasa sampai dah tak betul..panggil doctor kat opis pun boleh tersilap panggil uncle..hehehe..selamat dia tak marah..bile meeting tak henti2 nih,.mulalah,otak sakit n mulalah nak bergaduh je ngan sume org.pantang silap sikit rasa nak naik angin je..lepas launching nnti masalah lain plak yg akan timbul..huhuhu..arghh..letih..letih..adehh..adeh..

tired...tired..tired..

ari ni letih sungguh lah..penat jaga budak2 dua org nih..yang si kecik dah mula menunjukkan perangai macm si abang..nak menagis2,jerit2..tak dapt bnda nak ngamuk..suara dah lah nyaring n kuat..letih n sungguh tak larat...bosanlah mcm ni..rasa nak angkat bendera putih je..antar budak2 kat kampung..malas nak jaga..tp nnti rindulah pulak..tapi perangai diorg ni mmg tak tahan..mcmane nak buat???hilang sabar sungguh..semalam si adik dah berbenjol kepala..gara2 lompat sofa.nak test kepala kut..kejap ni buat lagi perangai macam tuh..si abanglah yang mengajar..aduhh...penatnye..tak tahu nk gambarkan mcmane rasa penat tuh!..tekak ni sampai rasa peritlah menjerit marah budak..heeee..tak tahulah perasaan ni..pandang diorg rasa kecik je..rasa meluap2 perasaan tak suka..tak baik sungguhh!!!bile cerita kat mak..senang je mak bg solution..'suruhlah ayah dia dtg,jaga anak..'hbs tu ayah dia tak payah keje kah???ini pun satu problem..senang je org tua ni bg keputusan..actually bukan keputusan,pilihan untuk aku..pilih family atau dia???arghhhh!!!!runsing..nyampahlah...

i miss u

sunyi lah rasa malam nih..rindu..rindu pada dia..bilalah sume ni akan berakhir???harap2 pengakhiran yang baik untuk aku,dia,anak2 dan family..

minggu ni mood tak best..mood rasa kehilangan..actually mood rindu..

harap2 next week akan ada berita gembira dr dia..

Back to normal

today my life back to normal.no more him at home.so sad.4 days he with me,with our kids..my kids very happy..sometimes i think & ask to myself..when this will over???i need the natural life..i need life with him around me..no need to hide anymore..pity my children..pity to me & pity to him too..this is a good lesson to him..hope he will remember & not to do again all the mistake..mb someday,there will a happy life to me..

amin...

I hope this is a right decision

It's difficult to explain...

I think if I share with everyone,not everyone will understand..It's difficult to me to do this decision.If he with me,mb it's different,eventhough I'm not ready yet...because I'm alone...

I hope someday,he might be understand & not blame me..I have to do it!

I'm sorry dear...

I love u so much..

I'm sorry...